Uzuri means beauty, and that she is. The sister, creative, dancer, teacher, crystal healer, wife, and mama has learned so many things throughout her journey into motherhood. One thing she knows for sure is that the children that she lovingly calls her garden control her and husband Bashiri’s lives. They’d have it no other way! The children ranging in age from 15 to newborn have been flourishing and growing into greatness with their supportive parents setting the intentions for what they want for their family.
Throughout her life Uzuri spent time around women that were proponents of unmedicated birth. She didn’t give it much thought until it was time for her to start a family. Upon finding out she was pregnant with her first child she already knew that she wanted to have an unmedicated birth with a midwife. Her husband was on board and supportive, so they would have their first birth at a freestanding midwifery annex. In her first personal experience with childbirth she'd end up experiencing a 25.5 hour birth. She recalls being, “a screaming fool!” She attributes it being a rough delivery to her reaction. The midwife would tell Uzuri to wait until her contractions are to the point of basically not being able to speak. She listens and waits, in the most literal sense of the word. It would take them an hour to get her through triage, while in labor!
Labor is stop and go for hours, but Uzuri finally reaches transition. She found the position that worked best for her body. Reading about birth can't fully prepare you for what you will actually experience--a sentiment that Uzuri shares. She admits to being terrified because there was no preparing herself for the pain she experienced. She resorted to what she knew and had seen on tv--screaming and hollering (her words). She acknowledges that her birth could have gone more smoothly and been less exhausting if she had relaxed.
In contrast, Uzuri’s latest birth which is 15 years after the first was much more peace filled. “I essentially taught myself hypnobirthing.” HypnoBirthing is a childbirth practice that aims to help a woman deal with any fear or anxiety she may have around birth. It involves various relaxation and self-hypnosis techniques to help relax the body before and during labor and childbirth. She knew she wanted a different experience, so over the years leading up to her last birth she learned how to channel herself and each birth got easier and shorter. Noble, baby number 5 would be born in record time. From the time she knew she was in labor to baby being born was approximately a little over 4 hours.
She awoke on her delivery date with big plans to clean and organize, acknowledging as she moves about that her contractions that she had been experiencing felt a little different that day. Even after a shower she could still feel something that was different than previous days. She’d inform her husband and nearly immediately things shifted. Uzuri knew that her baby was coming very soon. After informing her doula of how close her contractions were her doula would get ready to head to her. By the time she arrived Uzuri was ready to go herself. Her husband would get in formation and do his part to support his wife bringing their fifth child into the world.
Noble's Newborn toesies
Uzuri recalls experiencing a moment in transition where she was having deep contractions and she shared with her husband that she "needed to go get the baby". Bashiri would encourage her to make it happen. She went back into go mode and 15 minutes later their baby boy, Noble would be in their arms.
Each birth for Uzuri gave her an even greater sense of freedom than the one before. This birth allowed her to feel a calm and sense of preparedness that she hadn’t experienced before.
It has been Uzuri’s experience with 2 births in particular that upon telling people that she was pregnant people would have the tendency to project their fears based on what their previous experiences had been and they didn’t even realize it. She fully understands the need to take care of “the people that create people”. It's a sentiment that she wants more of our people to understand.
Comparing her first birth to her fifth Uzuri had all of the bells and whistles, much of it was not used. For her last birth she had a homebirth kit and ensured that everything they did was intentional to receive the outcome that they would want. The experience that came with her motherhood journey would allow her to protect her peace, understand her body, and supplement with herbs for the things that her body needed. She kept her distance from any and everyone that might come her way with negativity or low vibrational thoughts and kept positive uplifting folks close. While pregnant with her first baby she had conversations with the women in her family and watched birth related shows on television, and in hindsight she knows she was carrying all of those stories with her. With her fifth, she utilized the knowledge that she had gained from her previous births. Physically she kept her body moving and stayed hydrated. The home birth kit would have the bare minimum necessities. She had that mama wisdom that told her it was all going to be as it should.
Believing in the power of manifestation and the law of attraction she acknowledges how we can curate our births. She stood firmly in knowing that even if she had to birth her baby on her own for whatever reason, she would do so without doubt and with the focus necessary. Understanding fully what it means to be a black birthing woman in this world, Uzuri couldn’t help but to think about the plight of other black birthing women. Supporting our sisters is a sentiment that Uzuri fully understands. She is adamant about women’s roles in supporting birthing mothers, advising from a positive standpoint. Women have to take back the control of their births, and we do that by passing down wisdom amongst our people. Some of that wisdom includes understanding that mama’s need support on an ongoing basis after childbirth. It doesn’t stop after a couple of weeks postpartum.
Uzuri shares her experience postpartum with baby number 5 and how quickly everyone seemed to forget that she had just given birth. With each of her children she had experienced some postpartum depression due to lack of support and she was determined to not get to that space this go round. After coming across a video about postpartum in Ethiopia, where women create a community around the new mama--essentially ensuring that the mama is never alone or in need of anything, Uzuri began to feel those feelings creeping back in. My sister, still intentional and determined to do something about it, would decide to reach out to people that she knew she could talk and vent with. With some sisterly nudging Uzuri reached out to people that had offered their help and it came with the quickness. She asked and she received. What she hasn’t yet received is where exactly the disconnect is with understanding just how much support is for birthing moms and their households.
She offers simple tools that folks need to hear about how they can offer support to mamas in the postpartum period. She reinforces that each mama’s birth is hers to do with what she desires and she is entitled to her voice because it is so powerful.
Peace, 15 and Noble, newbie
Waistbliss from Mayasa Design House
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